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    "result": {"data":{"sanityStory":{"title":"Owen's story: Managing communication challenges","_type":"story","datePublished":"5 September 2023","header":{"background":{"value":"#FFD29D"},"headline":"Owen's story: Managing communication challenges","text":[{"_key":"cc738479fd64","_type":"block","children":[{"_key":"e1283da23424","_type":"span","marks":[],"text":"\"One of the biggest challenges for me during the perinatal period was communicating with my wife.\""}],"markDefs":[],"style":"normal"}],"image":{"asset":{"_id":"image-69e0e9c4b60eefcd83558f27f31fd6b632b4205f-4624x2604-jpg"},"crop":null,"hotspot":null,"alt":"Dad spending time with his daughter on digger"}},"content":[{"_key":"bc5999dffc7c","_type":"block","children":[{"_key":"8629bdf634080","_type":"span","marks":[],"text":"I'm 36 years old and moved to Adelaide from New Zealand six years ago to be with my wife. In 2019, our daughter was born."}],"markDefs":[],"style":"normal"},{"_key":"e4563b76705e","_type":"block","children":[{"_key":"c974eb9c97210","_type":"span","marks":[],"text":"One of the biggest challenges for me during the perinatal period was communicating with my wife. While my expectations of parenthood largely lined up with the reality we faced, it was learning how I could best support my wife that was surprising and difficult."}],"markDefs":[],"style":"normal"},{"_key":"06337670112f","_type":"block","children":[{"_key":"a5e95bf628cb0","_type":"span","marks":[],"text":"Usually for new parents the nights are the hardest part, but for me it was going to work in the morning. Every day was extremely stressful being away from my family while my wife was at home learning how to be a parent, and I tried to provide reassurance over the phone. I began to dread every text that arrived because I was confused and uncertain about what to say or do to help."}],"markDefs":[],"style":"normal"},{"_key":"a453f059e9fc","_type":"block","children":[{"_key":"bb74284cffb50","_type":"span","marks":[],"text":"While our daughter was healthy and thriving, my wife struggled during the postnatal period. I needed to learn how to communicate better with her. I didn't know what to say or do to help. Initially, I just flipped straight into the \"problem-solving\" mode and tried to suggest ways for her to fix things but that wasn't what she needed. I found it difficult to understand what she did need. Often it was just to be listened to (which I found intensely frustrating). Sometimes I just had no idea what to say. I felt utterly useless and helpless."}],"markDefs":[],"style":"normal"},{"_key":"84ac12e34ec5","_type":"block","children":[{"_key":"3397a64961950","_type":"span","marks":[],"text":"Stressing about my family at home while I was at work during the day started taking a toll on my mental health. I felt like I couldn't talk to my wife about it because I didn't want to impact on her. So, I got in touch with a men's helpline to talk a few things through and researched some fatherhood websites for strategies. I took on as much housework as I could, and we called for backup: her mum, our child and family health nurse, and our GP."}],"markDefs":[],"style":"normal"},{"_key":"e9438d4ff942","_type":"block","children":[{"_key":"5c8e0acf599d0","_type":"span","marks":[],"text":"It didn't improve right away, but at least I felt like I had made things slightly easier for us and that I was in control of the situation a little more. Slowly by the time our daughter was nine months old we started finding a rhythm and things got better. We learned to communicate with each other better."}],"markDefs":[],"style":"normal"},{"_key":"4d77455f76aa","_type":"block","children":[{"_key":"86f3e11778c40","_type":"span","marks":[],"text":""}],"markDefs":[],"style":"normal"},{"_key":"01917a094684","_type":"quote","quote":"Make sure your expectations are realistic - I think the first 6-9 months of parenthood is hard on everyone. 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You’ve got to reach out, especially when you feel like you’re both struggling."}],"markDefs":[],"style":"normal"}]}},{"title":"Dave's story","_type":"story","slug":{"current":"daves-story"},"header":{"image":{"asset":{"_id":"image-bf14361aeef2caf07ac277b0daa9f8f7f04552e0-1475x1600-jpg"},"crop":null,"hotspot":null,"alt":null},"text":[{"_key":"8a66eedfa94f","_type":"block","children":[{"_key":"9e311c91ccdd","_type":"span","marks":[],"text":"A dad's story of his journey recovery from postnatal depression"}],"markDefs":[],"style":"normal"}]}}],"seo":{"metaTitle":null,"metaDescription":"\"One of the biggest challenges for me during the perinatal period was communicating with my wife.\"","socialImage":{"asset":{"_id":"image-69e0e9c4b60eefcd83558f27f31fd6b632b4205f-4624x2604-jpg"}}}}},"pageContext":{"slug":"owens-story","isStory":true,"lastMod":"2023-09-11"}},
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